Missed Signals
by mini-cactus
Summary: What if jordan had relised how she felt before Woody had been shot?What if he never ended up in that hospital bed? Could she get him to hold her a little tigher? post enmbracible you pre P.J.F
1. Chapter 1

**A/N This is my fisrt Fanfic. hope you like it written prePJF. next chp will be a while away coz i' going overseas. please R.R. enjoy**

Woody reached across the desk and pushed the switch turn off his computer. It had been a long couple of days. He couldn't imagine Nigel was feeing. Slowly he flicked open his phone and punched in Nigel's number.

"Hey Nigel, how you doing?" Woody asked a touch of concern in his voice.

"Yea I'm okay I'm just relaxing with Jordan and Bug ya want to join us "

The tall Britt asked over the phone . Woody suddenly became aware that in the commotion of the day he hadn't eaten all his hunger over powered is unwillingness to see Jordan.

"Yeah I'll see you there in ten"

"See ya soon" Nigel called as he hung up his cell.

"That was our boy Woodrow . He be here in ten."

Jordan groaned inwardly. She had barely seen Woody since that night in her office. Nigel gave her a searching look as bug rambled on about some John Doe that Lily found alive in the morgue.

"I should probably get going"jordan said as she stood.

Now Nigel new something was up, Jordan was never the first to leave and she hadn't even finished her drink.

"Sorry guys". she continued.

Before Nigel could voice his concerns Woody entered that bar.

He looked around trying to locate his friends . His eyes fell on Jordan first , instantly in felt a pang of longing that had had imbedded itself in the pit of his stomach the moment he met her. He sighed. No. No more could he go on wanting her. They were and that was how it had to be for both their sakes.

Seeing Woody Jordan sat down. She both wanted to sneak away to hide or run up to him and wrap her arms around him, of course she did neither. "Hey Nigel thought you like to know Maddy's safe and sound with her dad "

"Good to know "Obviously relieved that the whole ordeal was over .

"You want a beer Woody? " Jordan asked hoping her voice sounded normal.

"Uh…. better make it something stronger " he said in the general direction of Jordan as she walked towards the bar. "Make it two " She said to the bar tender who had been listening to the conversation.

She returned to the table to find Bug and Nigel deep in discussion about liver temp. rolling her eyes she sat down and handed Woody his whiskey. Woody stared at his drink it was the colour of her eyes , her beautiful whiskey coloured eyes. Quickly he picked up his glass and skulled his drink.

" Anyone want an other drink" he said as he turned towards the bar. Bug being man the observant man he is saw the look that Nigel was now giving Jordan "ah yeah I come with you Woody "

As the two left the table Jordan was deliberately avoiding Nigel's look. "What's up lov" he asked .

Jordan stared at her drink defiantly

"Nothing I'm fine " her voice a hoarse whisper.

"It's Woody isn't it" but before Jordan could answer the other two returned . Nigel couldn't help but notice that as the night wore on Woody got more and more drunk and Jordan became quieter and quieter.

Finishing her drink Jordan stood to leave

"hey guy's I better get going"

"yea we all should " bug agreed

"Home! Guys the night it still young" Woody protested

"yea I don't think that Woody is in any state to drive." Nigel commented.

"See ya " Jordan called over her shoulder as she walked briskly to her car.

"Jordan , I can't take on my bike".

Sighing Jordan unlocked the passenger side of car as Nigel brought the very inebriated Woody to the car .

On the drive to Woody's he sung 'My Brown Eyed Girl' the top of his lungs . Slowly silent tears fell from Jordan's cheek in to the darkness as she remember the many times Woody had held her tight and danced with her at her fathers bar.

She was thankful for the darkness as she pulled into the car park of Woody's apartment building and pulled the keys from the ignition. She quickly wiped the tears from her eyes with the back of her hand and guided Woody to his apartment. She walked in to him room and left him sitting on the bed still singing my 'My Brown Eyed Girl'.

"I'll get you a drink of water and some aspirin , your gonna have one hell of a headache tomorrow" Jordan said emotionlessly.

She walking out towards the kitchen she filled a glass of water and when to open the small cabinet near the door. As she opened it her breath caught in her throat. There amongst odds and ends was the little pink box Woody had given her for her birthday . Still holding her breath she picked it up and opened it exposing the beautiful diamond ring . It as just as gorgeous as she remembered . Why did he still have it? He had said he would take it back . What did it mean? Regaining her composure Jordan grabbed the aspirin and walked back into Woody's room. He was sitting on the bed struggling to undo his tie in his drunken state. Placing the water on the bedside table and turned to Woody.

"Here let me "she said softly as she bent down and loosened his tie. Woody leaned in closer towards her.

"Jordan"Woody started.His voice thick with emotion .

Before Woody could say another word their eyes locked. Slowly their lips met in a passionate yet gentle kiss. Breaking apart the kiss Jordan pulled away. Once gain their eyes met though this time only for a second before Jordan turned and ran . She was scared, not of Woody but of her feeling for him.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N _sorry i'v taken so long to update - just got back from over seas._**

**_thanks for the reviews - and the poiters _**

**_PLEASE READ AND REVIEW- hope u like it _**

Woody woke to the sound of his cell phone ringing drilling into his ears. "Hoyt" he answered groggily. The voice on the other end of the phone was his chief . "DOA 32nd st Hoyt"

"On my way chief"

He told his boss as he scribbled down the addresses. Snapping the phone shut he threw it down next to him .

He felt like he had jackhammers pounding on his head . Slowly the events of pervious evening came back to him . The pub , her and that kiss.

Swinging his legs over the edge of the bed he took a sip of the water on the table and took an aspirin for the pain in his head . Woody walked out in to the lounge and froze. The draw where he had put the ring was slightly open. Realization dawned on him. When Jordan had got the aspirin out she would have seen it .The ring . He would know that he hadn't taken it back Why hadn't he taken it back like he said he would ? He knew why – he just couldn't admit it to himself. It hurt chasing Jordan and being constantly pushed away ; but it hurt more just giving up on her. Sighing he walked off to the bathroom to have his shower. Hopefully she wouldn't be the attending ME.

Jordan stepped out into the cold Boston air. slowly she started jogging as she did of Woody whenever she needed a break from her own thoughts. No thoughts troubled her for twenty minuets until her phone interrupted her peace. "Cavanaugh'

She answered slightly out of breath. "Sure Garret I'll be there ASAP" said briskly as she shut her phone and hurried back to her apartment .

Half an hour later Jordan ducked under the yellow crime scene tape and showed the uniform her badge. She was greeted by those crystalline blue eyes. "Woody" she said softly not meeting his eyes. "Dr Cavanaugh " he replied his voice void of emotion , as if were talking to a suspect not his best friend. Jordan couldn't tell if he could remember last night or not. Even if he did remember he seemed determined to ignore it. If that's the way you want it , fine Jordan thought to her self as she walked over to the victim. Silently she examined the body. "hi lov" Nigel said as he ducked his tall frame under the doorway. His voice brought her mind back from her work. Jordan turned and gave Nigel a meek smile. Reading her mood instantly Nigel thought it best to let her do her thing . "What we go ?" "Female between 20-30 COD appears to be a stab wounds the chest abdomen "she paused and looked down at her thermometer. "And judging by liver temp she's been dead about twelve hours". Nodding Nigel turned and said over his shoulder "I'll go talk to the cops " careful not to mention Woody.

"Hi Nige " Woody said sounding more tired that he had in weeks.

" how the head " asked with a slight grin

"as side from felling like I've been bashed around the head? I've had better nights" Woody smiled back. Chuckling softly Nigel turned to the uniform behind him and organized for him to come and help get the body back to the morgue " Ready to go " Nigel asked as Jordan stood from the body "yep lets get out of here" .

Twenty minuets later Jordan was dressed in her scrubs as she walked into autopsy on to start. "just got word from Woody. Our Vic's name is Caitlin Drew, 25 year old med student " "And soon to be mother" Jordan replied as Nigel entered . a grim look came over Nigel's face. "Three months , she may not have even known"

The two had finished the autopsy and were in trace by the time Woody arrived. "so what can you tell me ?" Woody asked a little too cheerfully "well it…"Nigel stated but Jordan cut him off "She was three months pregnant killed by single stab wound to the chest Nigel knows the details" taking quick breath she turned and left. Woody stood dumbfounded for a second. Where were the theories , the obsession , was Jordan Cavanaugh walking away from an investigation or just running away from him?

" So what's the story " Nigel voice called him from his thoughts

"Umm, well as far as we now our vic"

"not with that case, with you and Jordan " Nigel interrupted forcefully.

"Ah" was all Woody could say as he stared at his feet. Nigel face bore an expression of confusion and Woody's of pain. It seemed that neither man actually new what was going on. "it's a long and complicated story ; as everything is with Jordan " Woody sighed as he said the last part. His heart and head were battling. He knew that he couldn't go on like this . He had to move on . He to forget how her lips felt against his . He had to truly move forward– he had to get her out of his heart. Nigel saw the look confusion and distress that had come over the detectives clear blue eyes. "I'll have someone send over the reports " Nigel said softly "thanks, I needed to get out of his place" Woody said the confusion anger audible in his voice.

Jordan was beyond confused beyond scared and beyond tired. So she did the only thing she could do to help her cope- besides run. She threw her self into her work- and not just any work paper work.

It was late by the time Nigel was read to leave slouching from tiredness he walked to the elevator. A light in Jordan 's office caught his attention. Peering through the open door he say Jordan's head resting on the desk with her curly hair covering her face. Moving over so he stood in the doorway he called softly "bit tired love? " Jordan raised her head and looked at Nigel . her eyes were red and her cheeks flushed , it was obvious she had been crying. "what's the matter love" he asked stepping over the thresh hold. "matter? I'm fine" she replied in a voice that sound like she was trying to convince her self as well as him "darling you've been doing paper work for four hours- with out a gun to your head "Jordan's dislike of paperwork was that of legendary proportions. "really Nige I'm fine I think I'll just head home" Nigel gave her a searching look and the replied "why don't you let me take you home that way I won't worry" Jordan chuckled she was touched by the tall Britts concern. "really Nige I'm fine just a bit tried. Nothing a strong black coffee couldn't fix" "come on we'll go grab then " half sighing half laughing Jordan stood and grabbed her bag " ok fine you win" Jordan laughed . It was the first time she had smiled all day.

The pair walking briskly in the cool Boston air. They stopped outside a small Italian coffee bar. They sat in silence for a few moments staring into their cups. Jordan's held strong dark coffee; Nigel's held a slightly weaker liquid drizzled with honey. "Jordan " "mmmm" she responded as she took another sip off the dark liquid. "you going to tell me what's going on" "Nige seriously I'm fine there's nothing on " she said not moving her eyes from her coffee cup. Nigel gave her a stern look "love tell me " "about what?" she said trying to sound ignorant "about you and Woody" she had wonder if some one would notice the difference in their relationship. Their respective coldness she should have guessed that it would be Nigel. "it's a long.." "and complicated story? "Nigel finished her sentence for her. Jordan gave him a questioning look "Woody" Nigel said sipping his coffee. Jordan stared once again down into her cup and the dregs of her of coffee. "After my birthday, Aa..after the ring" Jordan started . she could barely contain the tears welling in her eyes. This expression of raw emotion worried Nigel even more , Jordan was one of those people who would hold everything in then blow up. Nigel reached out and grabbed her hand "it's ok love"

"that's just it Nige its not "she paused trying to gain control over her emotions "I'm scared I've lost my best friend." Even Jordan was shocked that she was actually voicing her thoughts "The man that I lo.. " before she could finish he dissolved totally into tears. Nigel sighed he knew how bad Jordan was hurting and he knew how far earth she'd come to admit it to her self let alone try and say it. "he's right we would probably kill each other in a week if we ever did get together " "pfff come on Jordan every person on the earth thinks you two were made for each other " "ha ,every one but him. I've caused more pain for him than I'm worth " she said a silent tears ran down her face. "Jordan , Jordan look at me" any one who can live through what you have and accomplish what you have is worth all the tears in the world – and all the love. And if Woody's to proud to give that little but more then he's the one that's causing more pain than he's worth." A slight smile came over Jordan's face. Standing her said "come on lov I'll take you home" they walked out of the café with Nigel's arm comfortingly over Jordan's shoulders

Half an hour later after taking and exhausted Jordan home he flicked his phone open and dialled Woody's number. "We need to talk " "fine I'm home come join the party" Woody replied sarcastically his words slurred.


	3. Chapter 3

**a/n **thanks for all the review and please keep them comming - the more u write ,the more i do !

sorry only a short chapter - i'll update soon again i promis

Woody staggered over the door and opened it to reveal the tall Brit. Nigel's expression was of anger and frustration.

"Come in," Woody directed sharply even though his words were slurred.

"Woodrow you wanna tell me just what exactly went on with you and Jordan?"

"Nope. Why should I?"

"So I can stop her before she runs," Nigel retorted sharply.

"At least some one else can go after her now, I'm through chasing her" Woody said, as he sat down and poured him self some vodka (he couldn't bear to drink whisky any more ) from the near empty bottle. Swallowing the whole glass sharply he stared away from Nigel out of the window.

"I know about the ring" Nigel's voice came from behind him.

"That's all I know except for what from what Jordan's told," Nigel paused he didn't know how much Woody knew about what was going on in Jordan's head.

" I gave the ring , she rejected it. I told her I'd had enough and that we would be better of as friends" Woody's voice was void of any emotion except for the fact that he sounded utterly exhausted.

"That's all and if Jordan's chucking one of her tantrums that's her problem. I don't really care." his tone sounded like he was trying to convince him self as well as Nigel. Nigel's cell phone interrupted. Woody called over the ringing phone, "And I'm not here so she can just kiss me and run away" suddenly Nigel clicked. That's what had happened the other night. They had kissed. Distractedly he answered his phone. "Hell.." before he could even finish Jordan loud voice interrupted him.

"I'm gonna do it Nige " she sounded drunk.

"What I should have done a long time ago. Where does he get of he saint bloody Woodrow ? No wonder his brother's a cot case. Who could possibly live HIM, let alone try to live up to him or his standards." There were foot steps coming from outside Woody's door.

"Jordan where ar…"

Before he could complete his question Jordan barged through Woody's door. She stopped looked at Nigel for an instant then turned to Woody and started yelling.

"HOW DARE YOU THINK YOUR SO DAMN PERFECT!" she yelled at him. Standing, he walked over closing the distance between them.

"ME ! WHAT ABOUT YOU ? YOU OBSESSION THE POINT OF DRIVING EVERYONE AWAY!" "ATLEAST I'V LIVED A LITTLE! "

"YOU CALL PUSHING EVERY ONE WHO'S EVER LOVED YOU AWAY LIVING? MOVE ON FROM THE PAST JORDAN. YOUR NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO LOST SOME ONE! "

Jordan moved even closer to Woody's her eyes were dark and they shone with unshed tears. Woody swallowed she'd never looked more beautiful that she did right now. It epitomized her a mixture of variability and power of anger and innocence. They were so close they could feel each other's breath. Nigel stood motionless at the entrance to the room. They both seemed to have forgotten his presence.

"At least I let people say what they wanted to say before I give up on them." her voice was barely above a whisper and as she spoke a single tear fell down her cheek. Before Woody could think about what he was doing he was kissing her. She responded willingly and the kiss deepened. Nigel stood frozen on the spot scared about what would happen if he moved. Slowly their lips parted from each other's. As they broke apart Jordan brought her hand up and slapped Woody across the face. Tears were now streaming down her face, briskly she jogged out of the apartment straight pass the stunned Nigel. Woody turned back to the table and didn't even bother to pour a glass of vodka ; he took a swig straight from the bottle. In stunned silence Nigel walked out of Woody's apartment and found his was home: leaving the drunken detective alone with his vodka.


	4. Chapter 4

**a/n sorry i'v taken so long to update. plz tell me wat you think. more reviews - more i write**

**hope u like it :P**

The elevator doors opened and Jordan stepped out into the mostly deserted morgue. It was about five am but her shift didn't start till seven. She had had yet another sleepless night and didn't see the point in staring at the ceiling for two hours. Stepping into her cold office, she turned on the lamp and threw herself into the work as she had done every other morning that week.

It was eight o'clock when Garret found her asleep ; her head on her hands.

"Jordan , Jordan " he called from the doorway. Jordan sat up quickly.

"Mmm ,huh sorry Garret what'd ya say? "

Smiling Garret replied "c'mon let's go for a walk."

Five minuets later they were walking through the cold Boston air. For the first time in her life even though she was hurting she didn't feel like she had to run. No longer could she run. She needed to grow up , to face her fears- her feelings..

"He tried to give me a ring you know. But of course me being me I didn't except it " Jordan laughed humorlessly .

"I actually wanted too accept it but … I attempted to it explain to him but he wouldn't let me"

Garret didn't ask for any explanations nor did he push. He just walked beside he a silent comfort.

"I was trying to make my self admit it, to just go with it. I wanted to take the risk but …" she paused struggling to find the words.

" And then he goes and gives up on me " she stopped her voice faltering.

"The other night, when he was drunk I had to take him home." She drew a heavy breath and swallowed harshly "He told me he would take it back , the ring . And then I find it"

She no longer seemed to be talking to Garret but seemed to be merely thinking aloud. They continued along the path in a heavy silence . Garret placed a comforting hand on Jordan's shoulder, as if suddenly aware of his presents she turn quickly to face him.

"Garret I think... I mean, I do" her voice sounded like that of a small scared child.

" I .. I love him " her words now barley audible , smothered in tears. Swiftly she turned away and started to walk swiftly . Gradually her stepping turned into running and she fled into the shapeless gray of winter. Garret stood and watched as she ran , her long hair flying in every direction. He was one of the only people that would ever understand how deeply it had cost jordan to say those words. How they instantly evoked fear of loss , of grief and of betrayal from with in her. He knew that she could no longer run from her self and from the look on her face do did she. She needed some space so she could find her self once she had stopped running. But he would still be around as a silent comfort.

"Nigel, call Woody. I cant find Jordan," Garret instructed. It was now eight o'clock at night and the cold Boston air had now turned to freezing. He hadn't seen Jordan since that morning nor could he get in contact with her. He was now kicking himself for letting her run off. Garret, lily, Nigel and Bug were all talking franticly when Woody entered the room. As he had driven there he kept asking himself why he was coming. She wasn't his responsibility any more. She had other 'friends' that could look after her. But no matter how many times he told him self that or how much he tried to turn his feeling of hurt into anger he couldn't. He still loved her. None of them bothered to acknowledge him, weather out of worry or anger it wasn't clear. Garret was doing what he did best - giving orders. Though his fear and concern was clear he was still in control.

"Right Nigel, if she's run for good then she will have left a trail :find it. Lily, go to her apartment. She may still be there or even come back there." He said as he handed lily the key Jordan had given him.

"Bug you stay here . I'll go and see if I can find her. When I last saw her she was pretty up set and didn't seem to particular about hiding it."

he turned to give Woody a look but he didn't seen it . Woody was already walking to ward the elevator . He knew where she was.


	5. Chapter 5

**a/nhey guys hope u like thelastest chapter, i dont know if i am gonna write any more of this one so let me know if you want me 2 -plz read and review**

**p.smany thanks to my friend Tash - who irons out all my editing probs **

It was almost dark when Jordan stopped to gather her thoughts. She was at her mothers grave. She didn't remember how she got there or that she had even intended to go there. She just sat in silence lost in a world of memories and pain. Gingerly, she lay down like a child her hands between her head and the cold earth.

She didn't know how long she lay there, nor if she was lost in memories or dreams.

It was the sound on foot steps on gravel that finally dragged her thoughts out of her past and back to reality. Tentatively she raised her head. Even though the darkness she recognized those crystalline blue eyes. At that moment she felt her heart both braking and rejoicing. With out any words he reached down and scooped up her small frame. Holding tightly to one another, thankful for the closeness, he carried her to his car. After he gently placed her down, he flicked open his phone.

"Garret she's safe, she's with me."

Even through her foggy brain Jordan didn't miss the irony of his statement.

As they drove, they were both silent. The many thoughts that ran through their minds remained unsaid.

When they arrived, she was out of the car before he could he turn off the ignition. He sighed before slowly following her. He knew that every one would be there waiting. He stood at the door and watched as Nigel, Bug, Lily and Garret fussed over her. He could see that underneath that calm expression she had put on, she was sufforcating under her friends concern.

"Are you sure your okay?" Garret asks her too, scencing that she was not as she seemed.

"I'm fine. I just want to be left alone," Jordan half yelled, half begged.

"And no I'm not going anywhere so go home and get some sleep."

Her distress now quite visible.

"Goodnight Jordan" Garret said calmly as he placed a hand on her shoulder. The other three chorised goodbyes as they left. Woody followed them out wordlessly as Jordan closed her door. She turned to walk towards her room when she heard Woody's voice from the corridor.

"I'll stay garret, go home she's safe."

Listening closely, she hurd the elvator door close and Woody's walk towards her. For a terifying moment she thought he was going to knock on her door. But he didn't he just sat down his back againt her door. Slowly jordan sank down on the opposite side of the door. They sat like that for some time, only two inches of wood separating them: their thoughts on one another. Quietly, Jordan stood. She walked to her kitchen and poured herself a whiskey and skulled it. Then she confidently walk towards the door and pulled it open. Woody fell back into the doorway and looked at her in shock and confusion.

"You might be more comfortable on the couch." Jordan said in what she hoped was a cold voice. Deliberately she walked to the cupboard and got him a pillow and a blanket. Carelessly, she then thew them at the unsuspecting Woody who caught them awkwardly.

"Thanks" he replied softly as he sat down and pulled the short blanket over his torso. Silently she walked to her room.

Woody woke to the sound of sobs and screams. Jumping up, Woody ran into Jordan's room. Gently he sat down on her bed and lightly touched her arm.

"Jordan, Jordan, Jo. Wake up it just a dream."

Abruptly Jordan sat up awake. Tears streamed freely down her face. Her lips moved as trying to speak but all that came where soft haunting sobs. Woody needed no words. He knew that look. He knew it from the many times his own face had shadowed it. It was fear and pain beyond words. Careingly, Woody drew her close and held her. He didn't think nor care about what has recently past between them. His only thoughts were of Jordan and the deep pain they both shared. Her tears fell softly onto his crumpled cotton shirt, seeping through to his warm skin . The last of her lingering tears fell from her eye lashes as she drifted in to a restless sleep in his arms. Woody on the other hand didn't drift off until the wee hours of the morning. And even then, every time Jordan moved a millimeter he would wake.

Jordan's eyes fluttered open as light filtered through her closed curtains. Raising her head slightly she looked across to the clock. Nine am. Soundlessly, she turned in Woody's arms to face him. His short hair was all messy with several strands falling down onto his creased forehead, his eyes were shut covering his captivating crystalline blue eyes. Sucking a breath in Jordan whispered.

"I ,I " she closed her eyes and spoke again, her voice even lower than a whisper.

"I love you" as the words left her mouth her already fragile heart shattered into a million pieces. Calmly she gradually removed her self form Woody's arms. As she walked away she held in the deafening scream that echoed her heartbreak.

Woody waited until he heard her footsteps on the bathroom floor before cautiously opening his eyes. He had been awake for about half and hour : not moving so he could cherish his closeness to Jordan. He couldn't believe what he had just heard. Had Jordan really just uttered those words that he had been dreaming for hearing? The three words that he had known the moment her met her - did she feel that too? Did she really love him? Cautiously, he walked into the living room. It was time that he and Jordan talked, they only been avoiding it for four years.

In true Jordan fashion she had shower and dressed within minutes. She was standing over the bench drinking a strong black coffee. She looked up and their gaze met. For the first time he could remember, Jordan broke the gaze. Turing to place her cup in the sink she spoke her voice tight with controlled anger.

"Close the door behind you when you leave" was all she said a before grabbing her bag and walking out of door.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N Sorry i've taken so long to update. The story's all finished so i'm putting the rest up 2 day as well. Hope you like what the next three chapters bring ! I greatly apresiate any reviews good and bad :). **

**once again THANKS TASHI ! **

**Happy reading **

Woody slumped down on her couch. One minute she was bloody professing her love and then next she was telling him 'don't let the door hit you in the bum on the way out'. Why was he sending her so many mixed signals? He many not have gone to Hee Haw high but he wasn't a bloomin psychologist. Woody sighed. Would he ever fully understand Jordan?

No matter what Jordan did she just could not concentrate. Her co-workers watched her dart around the morgue, more of a hindrance than a help.

"Jordan, " Garret called through his slightly ajar office door.

Slowly the tall brunette walked into to his office and forcefully pushed the door fully open. She knew what was coming. It was time for the 'post Jordan freak out talk'.

"Garret I'm fine , just let me do my work" she said, her irritation clear from her tone.

"Jordan you haven't done a single thing all day"

Jordan sighed dismissively, though it was true. All she'd done was turn on her computer.

"Why don't you take the day off? I'll call you if we're desperate." From Garret's tone it seemed more like an instruction than a suggestion.

Jordan who was emotional exhausted didn't have the energy to fight.

"Fine! See you tomorrow, " she said begrudgingly as she walked out of his office.

She stood on the corner opposite the morgue. With nothing to distract her, she was at all loss of what to do.

_Great more time alone with my feelings_, she thought to herself. Instead of walking to her car she continued off in the opposite direction. She didn't know where to turn. To tell the truth, from the moment they had met Jordan had never Imagined her life with out Woody. She had final been ready to put her heart out there, to try and face her fears. Then before she the words had even formed on her lips her fear was confirmed - yet an other person she loved was pulled away from her. Every ounce of her fear was telling to run - to just slip into the old habit. To flea from the pain as she had done so many times before. But she knew this time was different. Tt was that fear that had caused the loss of the one person she thought she could trust with her heart. She knew that she had to grow up, it might be to late for her and Woody but it wasn't to late for Jordan to finally grow up.

Woody stepped out of his car and went to get himself a coffee. Hopefully it would kick start his brain. After Jordan had left, he had tried to get some work done down at the station. But he couldn't. He just kept hearing her lips utter those three beautiful works. Over and over again they ran again through his mind tormenting him.

"Hey Doc, you seen Jordan? She seems to have vanished, " Nigel asked as he peered around his bosses door.

"I sent her home.."Garret paused unsure of how much you give away to his younger counterpart.

"She needed some time to.." he paused again.

"Figure everything out about Woody?" Nigel interjected.

Garret motioned for Nigel to sit down as he nodded knowingly.

They sat in silence for a second before choosing there words carefully to fill each other in.

"They've kind of been… going through some …. big stuff, " Nigel said clumsily.

"Mm the ring," Garret added.

"And getting drunk several times. Oh and the fight."

"Yeah but something big happened last night. Usually when Jordan's upset you can get her off a case. Today she couldn't even put her scrubs on. "

"Who knows, I mean Woody left with us."

"Ah no he didn't," Nigel gave his boss a seaching look.

"After we left, he stayed behind to make sure she didn't run. As far as I know, he spent the night on her door step."

"Well there's no point trying to talk to Jordan. I think its pretty clear she's not excactly in the best state of mind."

"We have to do something. I'm pretty sure she wont be able to stop herself from running soon."

"Talk to Woody. He's pretty reasonable - when hes not drunk."

As Nigel finished talking Garrets mobile sprang to life.

"Woody? To what do I owe the pleasure of this call?" Garret asked his eyebrows raised at Nigel.

" Jordan, " Garret repeated , Nigels eyebrows also sprang up.

"We'll see you in about ten then," Garret flicked the phone shut with a bemused look

on his face.

Woody walked towards the closed door of doctor Macy's office and knocked lightly before entering.

The two men sitting in the office softly said hello as Woody joined them. They all sat in silence for a tence moment before woody opened his mouth.

"Where is she ?" he asked his tone gentle.

"On a call, " Nigel lied.

Look Woody I don't think you get how much you could hurt her." Garret started.

"And we are not going to let that happen, " Nigel continued menacingly.

"Fact of the matter is, if she ever found out we were doing this she'd kill us, but she's not going to tell… "

"She did, " Woody cut him off simply.

"What?" both men exclaimed.

"She didn't know I heard. Thought I was asleep."

As if reliving the moment himself, Woody told the two other men what Jordan had said and how her mood and manner change abruptly. Before Garret or Nigel could comment, Woody's phone sprang to life.

"Hoyt, " he answered automatically.

Snapping his phone shut he looked up to Garret.

"I've got to go. " They gave Woody a knowing smile as he left the office.


	7. Chapter 7

Jordan's phone buzzed in her pocket, pulling her attention back into the present.

Flicking it open she answered all business.

"Cavanaugh." She took at deep breath and listen to Garret's voice.

"Tell Nige I'll meet him there," she said before closing her phone.

Jordan stooped over the dead woman's body as Nigel took photos of the scene. He lay with one arm out stretched covered by the bed cloths. Jordan carefully lifted the sheet to find a smaller hand clasped within the woman's. Frantically, Jordan searched for a pulse. Sensing a faint one, she tugged on the arm, pulling into view the body of an unconscious girl no older than ten.

Fretfully Jordan yelled, "Some one call an ambulance!" as she held the girl in her arms.

Jordan had just finished the woman's autopsy when Woody walking through the morgue doors. She had managed to avoid him at the crime scene but that was impossible now.

"What have you got for me ?" Woody asked as Jordan covered over the body.

"She was killed by blunt force to the skull. Hit repeatedly with a blunt object," she said picking up the x-rays and lifting them to the light to show him.

"There were no signs of a fight and it would have taken a few hits to knock her out totally. You'll have full reports tomorrow," Jordan continued mater of factly.

"What? No paper work to catch up on? " Woody asked, his farm boyish charm shining through.

"Ahh no," Jordan said, simply.

"Anything in her system?" he asked, now mirroring Jordan's business like manner.

"Nigel's running it now."

"Okay thanks," he said, walking towards the door's to trace.

Jordan clear the sudden lump in her throat.

"What about the girl?" Jordans empathy was clear in her voice.

Woody paused his hand on the door.

"Still in a coma, I'm about to go talk to the father. "

His voice was solemn and cop like.

"She in boston general?" Jordan asked quietly.

"Yep." he said as he pushed the door open and left.

Jordan was to wrapped up in her own melody of memory and empathy to notice the supream look of longing as woody looked at her through the swinging door.

Jordan got off work about an hour later, and without even thinking, she drove over to the hospital. Some where deep down she knew that this trip was more about her own dark shadows than the little girl but she wasn't listening to that part now. Jordan knew the pain, the absolute loss of losing a mother. She knew that when this girl woke up she would need to know who killed her mother. Or was it her that needed to know.

She walked down the deserted gray corridor to the dreay service desk filled with tired nurses, ready to go home. After pretending she was some relative, Jordan located the girl.

Jordan walked through the intensive care unit, the faces of fearful loved ones haunted her as she walked.

She turned into the small white room, Woody and the girl's father talked in the cornor. She hovered just inside the door listening to the men's conversation.

"Thank you Mr Solice, we'll do our best to find out who did this," Woody turned and nodded at Jordan then turned back to Mr Solice.

"They say people can hear you talking when their in a coma, " he gave the man a short smile paused again and looked staight at Jordan .

"Just like they were asleep."

Jordan froze and stared at Woody. He mearly gave his usual farm boy smile and walked from the room.


	8. Chapter 8

**Sorry its so short , its nearly finised . Enjoy Plz R&R**

Jordan was sitting in her office stairing at the unusually small pile of paper work on her desk. The last time she'd done this much paper work, Garret had threatend her with suspension if she didn't catch up.

"Jordan ?" Woody said softly from her door way. She hadn't even noticed him until he spoke. She stood quickly unsure what to do. She had been ignoring the turmoil inside her and couldn't bare to be reminded

"Jordan I think we need talk " his demeanor was soft and calm.

Jordan's was the opposite she was screaming inside .

"I can't, I have to …" she looked frantically around the room for an excuse.

"I have to go water my cactus, " she said picking up the nearly dead cactus Nigel had given her for her birthday. Woody stifled a laughed as Jordan pushed through the door.

"I know your there guys," Woody said to the four morgue employees standing around the cornor.

"Garret, do you still have that key to her place?" woody asked.

"Sure," he said removing the key from his key ring.

"I'll send her home in about an hour." he continued knowingly.

When Jordan returned to her office, Woody was gone and she had a very wet cactus. She sighed. He couldn't possible of heard her say it, he was asleep. She wanted to know what it felt like to actually say it. Now that she knew it could never happen, it was safe to admit it. She ran her hands through her long wavy hair. If she didn't stop thinking, she was going to go insane. The incessant ringing of her cell phone drove her back to reality.

"Cavanaugh," she answered abruptly.

"Um hello doctor. This is Mr Solice, you said you wanted to know when Jemma woke up? She's awake."

"That's wonderful. Do you mind if I come and see her ? "

"No not at all , please do. "

"Thank you. "

She grabbed her bag and walked into Garrets office.

"I'm gonna go visit the Solice girl them I'm gonna head home. See ya tomorrow."

" See you tomorrow, on time would be good, bye."

Jordan arrived at Boston general twenty minuets later. She opened the door to the ten year olds room to find her sitting up eating ice cream.

"Hello I'm Jordan Cavanaugh," she said as she walked towards the bed. The girl looked up and gave her a searching look.

"I'm Jenna, " she replied simply. Jordan smiled weakly. Now that she was here she had no idea what to say to the girl.

"Dad said your mum died too."

"Yeah when I was ten." she said as she sat down.

"It sucks. I cant believe she's gone.. " she said as she reached across to the bed side table and picked up a photo graph. She stared at it for a moment before handing it to Jordan. It was a photo of Jenna and her mother taken recently, yet Jenna looked different in the picture. Her eyes no longer held the innocent look of a childs, she now had this sad knowing in her green eyes. Jordan's eyes also had changed, when she had lost her mother.

"Jenna, what ever you do don't let the grief run your life. You end up running from everything, not just the pain"

Jenna looked at Jordan confused for a moment.

"Jordan, just cause we cant see them doesn't mean there not there or that they love us any less."

Jordan studied the young girl.

"There right here. No one can ever take them from us. " she said as she placed her hand over Jordan's heart. Tears now ran freely from Jordan eyes .

"Thank you." Jordan said simply. They sat together in silence and for the first time in days no thoughts filed Jordan's head. Some time later Jordan gave her a hug and left for her empty apartment .


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N Thanks to every one who's reviewes . THIS IS THELAST CHAPTER. hope you like it !**

Jordan cried all the way back to her apartment. She cried for the loss of her mum, she cried because her dad wasn't there and she cried because she had run so far and so fast had pushed away the only man who she could be happy with.

She unlocked her big red door and dumped her bag on the floor. She walked into the kitchen and flicked on the lights and froze. There on the table was a familiar pink box sitting on top of a note. Jordan picked up the note and sunk into the nearest chair. There in Woody's untidy scrall was '_Ditto'. _She reached across the table and opened the small pink box and sure enough it held the beautiful ring. Carefully she slipped it on to her right hand. She looked at it uncertainly before pulling it off. It truly was a beautiful ring, taking a deep breath she slipped it on to her left ring finger. A light knock at the door made Jordan jump.

"Its open, " she called lost in though.

She was sitting with her back to the door unware of who it was that had just entered.

"Jordan " Woody said softly. She knew instantly who it was. She jumped up to face him shoving her hands behind her back. Woody looked at her intently, had he really just seen the ring on her **left **hand? They both held their breath.

_Crap_ Jordan thought to her self. They both stood silent for what felt like hours, their eyes meeting in fleeting glances.

"Jo" he said whispered, his voice soft and deep. "I love you too."

As Woody said the words, tears formed in Jordan's eyes and slowly slipped down her cheeks. Abruptly, Jordan started talking at a million miles an hour, rambling senselessly.

" I'm so sorry I was scared and I'd been running for so long and I don't know how to stop and I just want to run and I was so scared that I was gonna stuff up and that I was gonna lose you and every one I love..."

Stepping forward Woody placed a finger over her lips.

"I know, " he said simply before he lightly brushed his lip with hers. He pulled her into a tight hug, her small frame resting against him.

"Do you like your birthday present?" he asked, whispering softly into her ear. Slowly Jordan opened her clenched fist. The elegant diamond ring glinted in her hand.

"Look on the inside," he whispered again.

Lifting it up to the top of her fingers, she turned it slowly looking at the rim. There, engraved inside, was: _I love you - love Farmboy_. Jordan looking up into those Crystal blue eyes. Ditto was all she said before they kissed. This kiss was much more intense than any other they had ever shared. It was deep and passionate, filled with four years worth of longing. They slowly broke apart there faces still only millimeters away from each other. Woody slowly took the ring and slid in on her Jordan's right hand.

"A promise ring " was all he said before they lost themselves in an other kiss.

Jordan woke the next morning with Woody's arm warped tightly around her, his warm breath tickling her neck and the refection's from the diamond ring on her right hand, which was intertwined with Woody's. For the first time that Jordan could remember, Jordan didn't think , she didn't seach for answers or question anything , she just lay there and enjoyed the feeling of woody holding her a little tighter.


End file.
